Should I or shouldn't I

After my divorce about 13 years ago I have not dated [raising a daughter and work was enough; I don't feel like damaged goods]. Recently I connected with 2 past lovers: R and O. R and I had not seen one another in 40 years; O about 35. R is in a failing marriage but due to circumstances we can't seriously pursue a relationship for perhaps a year. O is recently widowed and will be visiting my area soon. My relationship with O will be purely sexual for a weekend, then she is off to see the world for two years. The future for R and me is uncertain so she approves my hooking up with O for a fling. I don't want to jeopardized my relationship with R even though she says it's OK because she feels she can't ask me not to see O while she is a married woman. Should I hook up with O?

A lot can happen in a year. You may even decide that R is not the one for you. Pursuing a relationship is not the same as having one. I'd say have a good time on your weekend with O. Don't divulge any details to R other than confirming your meeting with O if asked. Don't put your life on hold for something that is not yet a sure thing.

thanks for the response. it is probably what i wanted to hear from someone else. are you the dear abby?

i apologize for posting this question twice. i did not know if it was a relationship problem or a sexual problem.

Lol..no i'm not THE Dear Abby. Good luck with your situation.